The Heifers ~ FB Post ~ March 4, 2016

You know those days….where you feel like you’ve been going 100 miles a minute all day long for at least a week; the laundry is piled up; you have no groceries left; every kid has something going on; you’re dog tired and just can’t wait to crawl into bed?! You know the days I’m talking about. I know you do.

On those days, there’s nothing more glorious than sleep.  It comes quickly and easily.  In fact, sleep on nights like this can be so deep for me that all of the nighttime noises just blend into the dreams I’m having.  Dogs barking? Not a problem…those yapping wiener dogs blend into my dream just fine.  Funny noises outside my window? Those work into my dream pretty well, too.  Dogs barking again…hmmm…this dream is getting strange.  More sounds outside my window….am I still dreaming? (Before I go further, let’s stop to ponder the ability of the human mind and body to go from a peaceful, deep slumbering state to an electrified state of alertness in less than 2 seconds.  As well, it should be noted, that in my 15 years of marriage all slightly unnerving and out-of-the-ordinary events always occur when Guy is gone.)

Imagine my surprise as I throw back the curtain and see four little show heifers staring back at me!  AHHHHH!  My deep sleep and peaceful dreams were obviously over.  At this point, the only thought going through my head was, “The kids will be useless. By the time I get them roused, the heifers will be half way to Blair!”

So, I snag my coat, throw on my boots, and grab my phone as an afterthought, wondering, “Do I call Matt now, or wait until I’m in a real pickle?”  (Matt, our neighbor and friend, has been the first responder to many similar incidences where I call in a panic and he always says, “I’ll be right there.”)

What I would have given for our old border collie as I assessed the situation, but as it was, it was just me, the darkness, and four heifers who were partying like someone left the gate open.  As some may know, trying to herd heifers on a good day can be a bit of a challenge.  Never mind that these four heifers are halter broke and gentle.  All that means is I was trying to herd four arrogant divas who still have the flighty personality of your typical heifer.  They didn’t herd. They didn’t come to a bucket of grain.  They did, however, stop to destroy some hay bales for a spell so I could reconsider my plan of attack.  I certainly can’t take credit for their next move, it was just pure luck that they decided to make a bee line, at a sprint, of course, for the gate I opened into the roping lane!  What luck!

Now, I wonder which kid left the gate open and how long until I can fall back to sleep.

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